Mom....You're Dog is acting like a PUSSY!!!

Please know that the word up above in all caps was damn near impossible for me to type without wanting to insert an asterisks sign. What is even more concerning is that those words actually came out of my 8 year old daughter's mouth. Let me paint a picture. My kiddos had spent almost a full week at their father's house during the Thanksgiving holiday. I went to pick them up tonight after a long day of working.  We arrive home. I ask my daughter to help me and to let the dog out of his kennel to go outside. It's cold..he hesitates, I get it. My daughter then says and I quote..."Mom, you're dog is acting like a pussy, he doesn't want to go outside."At that moment I stopped dead in my tracks. My son tried jumping to his sisters defense, or just to try to jump in period. I think he feared for her...Truly. What happened next went as follows: The look of terror in my eyes. Followed by the look of confusion and the instant dropping of my bag unexpectedly. His mouth opened to speak before my mouth was even shut. He said..."We don't say that word here." Again..what?  Clarification please.  As in...You're ALLOWED to say words of that caliper at your dad's house? "No, mom." Backpedal followed by him thinking extremely fast on his feet and then some tripping over his own words. "I mean, we've heard that word before though." "Really, Because I'm 100% certain I've never said it!" By this point my daughter is crying, not realizing the severity or perhaps meaning of the word she used. Although...She did use it completely correct if she wanted to refer to a woman's anatomy in a derogatory way. Again, she did not hear that come out of my feminist liberal mouth..for sure. I explained to her that it was not her fault. Sometimes things seems to make sense at the time when you say them..sort of. That perhaps she thought it meant something else? That it's okay to say it one time on ACCIDENT but If I EVER hear it again...like that, or just otherwise, it will be followed by a punishment. I made it VERY CLEAR that this was her one time get out of jail free card and I better not EVER hear it again. She seemed to understand and apologized. I then started the task of explaining why people use that word in general to different things in essence making a round about reference to girls/women being the whiny weaker counterpart of men. That's when she had the Ahh Haa moment.  I could see the little Oh Heck No wheels spinning in her head...Yes, she is my daughter and she FINALLY got the reference!!! The next thing I did after I put the kids to bed was to send a text message to her father regarding his daughter using the P word and maybe IF he was using that word perhaps he could TRY to sensor it around his OWN DAUGHTER!!!  He then proceeded to tell me she probably heard me say it...I laughed so hard I almost peed my pants. Yeah...I'm constantly throwing down the P word over here...Using it in sentences. Referring to my own anatomy in a derogatory way..Whatever idiot.
Conclusion:
I'm no angel..Less June Cleaver..more Kathy Griffin. They might have heard me curse a time or two but I try not too, and I'm working on it. But rest assured...no P word usage at this household.
 I'm a firm believer in picking my battles. When dealing with crazy or even semi crazy it's best just to pick things that are only COMPLETE DEAL BREAKERS to have conversations with their father about.
The dealbreakers list...so far...
1. Don't let the kids run with knives, or scissors..duh.
2. If you're going to cuss please don't use derogatory horrible words either referring to vagina's, other races, or homosexuals...I'm not going to tolerate any of those words...EVER.
3. And please remember that although you watch a super cool show about a biker gang (Sons of Anarchy) that it's probably not appropriate to let our son watch it. I don't watch the show myself..but I hear there are some serious sexual scenes, raping of women, kidnapping, and other EXTREME things that PROBABLY isn't the best TV choice for a 10 year old...Seriously, no brainer.

The cherry on my sundae...It gets even better. My little baby's dad told me that he was starting to notice that he was beginning to take his fingers and act like he was shooting things, like a gun. He then asked me if I...had shown him this?? Inside my head I thought...hmmm...seems like this is a natural thing that little boys learn and just do, but rest assured in all of my FREE time as a single mom to 3 kids, working my rear off and running a household and moving at 90 miles an hour most of the time... does that seem like a Valid question to even ask? But out loud I said.."Oh yeah...Did I not tell you? We started shooting guns over here this week...a little pre toddler get him ready for deer season if you will, seemed like a good idea to me, don't you agree?" Of course..he was speechless, and THAT made the whole P word usage and otherwise rough day in general ALL WORTH IT!!!!
Happy Monday